Powerful Parenting Techniques
May 21st, 2009 by Dr. Paul
Today’s discussion refers back to an episode of Live On Purpose Radio on the same topic. Several myths exist about what parents can do to build the self esteem of their children. In this call, those myths are exposed and discussed, along with the most powerful ways to make a difference for your kids. You will also want to listen to the archived episode of Live On Purpose Radio, which will add to this discussion. Click Here to download.
May 7th, 2009 by Dr. Paul
What we say to our children can make a big difference in how they feel about themselves. Perhaps a more fundamental issue is what we have named them in our own mind. The name we choose for our kids, or ourselves for that matter, determines our reaction to them. If you have named your child “trouble-maker” either verbally or in your own mind, your treatment of that child will be very different than if you have named them “spirited”, for example. Name carefully!
Apr 29th, 2009 by Dr. Paul
We had the honor and privilege of being joined today for our call by Jacqueline Duckett, who is a long-time educator, mother, and developer of the TeacherTold product. Our conversation addressed some of the typical stressors that come into families as a result of school homework. In fact, this is one of the primary topics that parents and children mention as being at the top of the list for stressful interactions between them. Jacqueline shares some of her experience in how to better deal with this problem, including parents using their resources and power to establish more effective communication with the teacher.
Apr 21st, 2009 by Dr. Paul
The most important job in the world is not without its stressors. Especially in a world where there is so much on the plate of parents, it is enormously important for parents to understand the effect of stress on their family, and to take appropriate steps to address it. Consider this call to be the check up from the neck up as Dr. Paul and Dr. Jason address some common psychological issues and give four steps for managing stress as a parent.
Tantrums are nothing more than inappropriate attention seeking. Although unpleasant, they are fairly quickly managed when you take away the pay-off for the child. In today’s call, Dr. Paul and Darren Johansen discuss this typical issue, along with a little brainstorming of various stage 1 and stage 2 consequences. This short video captures a funny side of tantrums - enjoy!
Mar 31st, 2009 by Dr. Paul
As a follow up to last week’s discussion about what to do if you learn your child has been abused, we continue the discussion today with some thoughts specific to how you can handle a situation in which it is your child who is accused of the abuse.
As an added resource, I wanted to include for you a discussion that I had with two experts in the area of pornography on a local radio show a few years ago:
First hour
Second hour
Mar 24th, 2009 by Dr. Paul
I got a call recently from some good friends who were shocked to find out that their little kids had been exposed to an older kid who had violated some boundaries with them, including sexualized play and exploration. Unfortunately, this is something that I have dealt with on far too many occasions. This week’s call focuses on what parents can do when they learn that something like this has already happened.
1. Remain Calm – remember that nothing has changed other than your knowledge. This is usually more important than it is urgent. In the case I referenced, the abuse occurred several years previous to the parent’s knowledge.
2. Protect – Determine whether there is an ongoing safety or protection issue – if so, act as expeditiously as possible to address the ongoing safety of your children. Occasionally, laws related to child protection mandate that these incidents are reported to law enforcement or state agencies responsible for child welfare and protection. This is a whole other issue, and should be done in consultation with a trusted professional.
3. Consult – take whatever time and apply whatever resources are necessary to wrap your own mind around the issue. Work on your own understanding first. Confronting the child or the abuser is not appropriate until you have a pretty good handle on it yourself (especially if you are feeling homicidal). Find professionals who are familiar with these dynamics, counselors, clergy, close friends, etc., who can help you to debrief your own feelings and reactions so you will be ready to help your kids. It is more important to help your child than it is to pursue the offender.
4. Educate – Make an intentional effort to provide appropriate education to your children about touching, sexuality, and their bodies including special parts. This education should include specific instruction and counsel based on your family’s moral values. It should also emphasize responsibility for appropriate behavior and help kids to know that they are not responsible for the bad choices of others.
5. Communicate – keep those lines of communication open and create an atmosphere where there are no taboo subjects in your relationship. Incidents like these can lead to a variety of outcomes, depending on how people handle them. Your child is not hopelessly damaged for life – let’s help them make something else out of experiences like this.
Mar 17th, 2009 by Dr. Paul
Today’s topic was triggered by a blog post from www.5minutesforparenting.com. Our son came home a while back with the following:
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift - that’s why they call it the present.
As we face all of the numerous and sometimes very convincing distractions that are in our lives, let’s make sure we keep focused on the power and blessing of living in the NOW. Enjoy our discussion.
Mar 10th, 2009 by Dr. Paul
I interviewed a fantastic mom this week at Live On Purpose Radio, who had some ideas that I wanted to pass along. Mom’s get so focused on their home and family (understandably) that they sometimes forget that they have talents and abilities outside of the mothering and housework. Angela Ingo gives us a good example of creating opportunities through doing what you love - and in the process, you will hear some great tips on how to create a more cozy space in your home or office. Enjoy this special episode, and we will be back next week with the regular format. You can also see some great examples of redesigning space in your home with the stuff you already have at Angela’s blog - http://imaginecozy.blogspot.com.
Mar 3rd, 2009 by Dr. Paul
A subscriber recently wrote, “Dr. Paul I love listening to your parental power calls. Every morning I have to tell my two school age children at least a hundred times eat, brush your teeth, get dressed and the list could go on and on. By the time they get out the door in the morning we are both frustrated. We get up in plenty of time and yet rarely are on time to leave. Do you have any good advice for this frustrating time?”
In today’s call, we address this specifically by encouraging parents to get SET for teaching responsibility. SET stands for S=simplify, E=experiment, and T=tell them what YOU will do, not what THEY will do. We hope this discussion helps! Please post your comments HERE.
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