Discipline 101 - The Plus and the Minus
Nov 18th, 2008 by Dr. Paul
In today’s Parental Power call, the team takes on the very basics of discipline, which has everything to do with learning. Reinforcement and punishment are defined as what will increase behavior versus what will decrease behavior respectively. Each of these has a positive and a negative form - this does not mean good and bad, but whether you are adding or subtracting something. Understanding these basics of behavioral discipline will help you with children of any age. Don’t forget, your kids understand these principles already and are probably doing things on a daily basis to shape YOUR behavior.
I think every parent should be thrilled when they have a toddler. It is such a fun age and so full of adventure. A mom can loose all of her extra baby weight just chasing these exploratory powerhouses around their new world. I often tried to see through their eyes and it helped me reappreciate the little things again. Some moms complain about being “dumbed down” or loosing intellectual capacity from these years, but I believe it makes us more mature, more appreciative, and more aware… in touch. I am often sickened to tears when I hear of this age group being prime for abuse by their caregivers. Parents who see toddlers as a nuisance are too immature to grow with their babies…so they lash out at the inconvenience of the changes and new emotions children are experiencing at this age. Yes, It can be exhausting, but those unconditional hugs and kisses and little crayon drawings are so worth it! I have to comment on the overuse punishments… it is lazy. Discipline is not equal to nor is it defined as punishment. Discipline comes from the word “deciple” which means to follow. How we get our children to follow requires creativity, patience, and controlled actions, not reactions. when kids are punished for everything to make the parent feel better, or in control, the child most often becomes spoiled… yes spoiled, and demands more of others by punishing them himself to get what he wants. It’s a vicious cycle.